STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. – Having come from a big Colombian family, ever since childhood Andrea Uribe has always wanted a large brood -- so large, the hypothetical children could play five-on-five basketball and soccer games.
“I really always imagined having, like, a gaggle of children,” Uribe, 39, said.
Uribe, who identifies as queer and uses they/them pronouns, said it wasn’t lost on them that families for queer people don’t happen “as naturally,” but that wasn’t going to stop them -- Uribe just needed to take a different route to have the “gaggle of children.”
And earlier this month, Uribe started the journey to parenthood.
Ethan, 13, and Julian, 6, came from their native Colombia to live with Uribe for five weeks through KidSave.org – a non-profit organization that gives children from orphanages summer vacations in the United States with American families through foster-to-adopt programs.
Ethan and Julian have been living with Uribe in their Huguenot home for almost two weeks.
Andrea Uribe with their foster-children Ethan, 13, Julian, 6, and dog Lou, at their Huguenot home. (Staten Island Advance/Alexandra Salmieri)
“The biggest shock for me has been eating. Do you know how much they eat? They eat all damn day; they just eat and eat and eat. They’re just insatiable with the food,” they said with a laugh.
Since the children arrived, they’ve started opening up – more playful laughter and questions and less calling Uribe “ma’am.”
At the conclusion of the five weeks the children will go back to Colombia, but Uribe is already planning on filing paperwork to adopt them.
“Can I do it? Does it feel right? I think it does so far. I like adventures and this has been the biggest adventure I’ve been on so far,” Uribe said.
‘I WANTED TO BE ABLE TO PROVIDE A HOME FOR KIDS THAT WERE QUEER’
When Uribe imagined a family, it included speaking Spanish – which they reluctantly grew up speaking – and when the decision to foster or adopt was made, the new foster parent had hoped for an older boy.
“I work full-time and I’m single, so the thought of trying to do diapers; little kids need a lot of attention. All kids need a lot of attention but a different type of attention so for me, [five years old] and under was going to be unattainable without another partner to really help me,” Uribe said.
Andrea Uribe with their foster-children Ethan, 13, Julian, 6, along with several other Kidsave families in the airport after meeting for the first time. (Courtesy of Andrea Uribe)
KidSave wound up checking all the boxes – the children were Spanish-speaking, over the age of five, and Ethan had previously expressed gender and sexual identity questions.
“I wanted to be able to provide a home for kids that were queer. There’s a really high percentage of youth that are homeless are queer youth and I really wanted to be able to provide a loving and secure home for queer older kids because I can,” they said.
“I have the means, I have the job, I have the house, I have the resources,” Uribe continued.
JUMPING RIGHT INTO STATEN STATEN ISLAND
Uribe wasted no time showing Ethan and Julian what Staten Island has to offer.
The day the children arrived, the trio went to Bloomingdale Park to run around in the sprinklers.
Every morning the three head to the Tottenville Pool to practice swimming and cool off. They walk a park every day to take Uribe’s dog, Lou, for her daily walks. They’ve been to the beach and the zoo.
Next week when Uribe goes back to work, Ethan and Julian will go to camp at the JCC.
Ethan, 13, and Julian, 6 with their foster parent Andrea Uribe. (Courtesy of Andrea Uribe)
Even though they’ve been having a great time, it’s been an adjustment and a learning experience for Uribe.
“They said that kids that come from institutions feel like they can do anything and everything. So I’ll ask them if they’re familiar with something or if they know something. And [the kids] always say yes and it’s not at all true, not even a little bit,” Uribe said. “They don’t know anything, they don’t have exposure to anything. These are kids that have never seen a beach before and so they’re overconfident and they want to just go running into the water and I have to explain to them they can’t go all the way in.”
“I think, I’m very trusting, so when they say yes, I think, ‘OK, they can do it.’ And I just need to keep in check that it’s my job to make sure they’re safe and making sure they’re accurate in their own capabilities has been the hardest thing so far,” they continued.
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